I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
