My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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