one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
