If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
