his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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