Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I woke up under a house in Key West
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
