her vagine was all disorganized.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
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