Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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