You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
