I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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