She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
