Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
