omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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