You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
My liver is preforming stress tests.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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