I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Found your dick twin last night
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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