My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
