Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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