I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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