I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
