Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
You left your phone here
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