so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Randomize
