i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
