Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize
