Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
You are a genius and a whore.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
