Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Randomize