I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
