I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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