You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
