Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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