I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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