I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
