He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
He did a backflip because drugs
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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