ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Randomize