I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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