yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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