I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
