Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
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