i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
i've created a new STD.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
