going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
What happened to fro yo and sex?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
