He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
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