i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
