should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I made him laugh his dick is mine
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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