SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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