Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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