i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
is that a dick in a sweater?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
