based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
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