Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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