The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
