Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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