his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize