brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
